People are all involved in the filth of sex. One does not like presence of light during sexual activity. They get alarmed when the light comes on. Therefore they keep lights off. If the light falls on the spot of the sexual activity then one would not like that ‘the place of enjoyment’, the organ of sexaul interaction. That is why, what has Krupadudev called the ‘place of enjoyment’?
Questioner: ‘It is not worth vomiting over’.
Questioner: Yet, what is the reason for being so attracted to that part of the woman’s body?
Dadashri: This is due to our wrong belief. Why don’t we get attracted to a cow’s body part? It’s only our belief. There is nothing except for our belief. Destroy that belief and there would not be anything.
Questioner: Do these beliefs arise due to circumstances coming together?
Dadashri: These beliefs arise by what others say to us. Then by supporting those statements, your beliefs become strong. After all, what is in there in it? Just pieces of flesh!
The thoughts of sex arise in the mind by themselves. You must cleanse them with pratikraman. Then you must never say that sexuality is good, and it should not be so in your behavior. You must not look sensually at a woman, and you must not touch a woman. If you have touched a woman then you should do pratikraman, ‘Oh no, why did I touch her?’ This is because thoughts of vishaya begin with the act of touching.
Questioner: Is it not considered despising a woman?
Dadashri: That is not called despising. When doing pratikraman, you are asking for forgiveness from the pure Soul within her that, ‘I made a mistake, please give me strength not to do the same again.’ You have to ask for strength from the Soul within her. You have to ask for strength from whomever you have made a mistake against, so that you will keep getting strength.
Questioner: So then touch does have an effect, does it not?
Dadashri: At that time of effect of touch you should return to your state of awareness. ‘I am separate from this body, I am not Chandresh’. This pure awareness should remain. Whenever this happens, remain in pure awareness of the Self and ‘I am not Chandresh’.
The moment the thought of pleasure from being touched arises; you must uproot it and throw it out. If you do not do that instantly, then it will sprout and grow into a ‘tree’ within the first second. Within next second it will get you in its strangle hold and within the third second you would be strangulated.
If there is no account from the previous life, then even a simple touch will not happen. Even if a man and a woman were to spend a long time alone in one room, not a single thought or impulse of sexual nature will arise.
Questioner: You said that attraction occurs because there is an account between the two. Then how can one get rid of that account before it unfolds?
Dadashri: That can only be done if it is done at that very moment when it happens. It cannot be done in advance. The moment a thought like, ‘Let me reserve some space next to me for a woman’, arises in your mind, you must get rid of it right away. ‘What is the intention’, see that as soon as it happens. You have to recognize the intention behind that. Is it in line with your principle of brahmacharya or is it contrary to it? If it is contrary to your principle, uproot it and throw it away instantly.
Questioner: I do not want to touch anyone, but what should I do if a girl comes and touches me?
Dadashri: I see. What would you do to a snake that wants to touch you? How can one like touching a woman or a man? How can one like touching something that is simply ‘filth’?
Questioner: But while touching whatever is being discussed here does not come to mind.
Dadashri: Yes, but how will it ever come in mind? At the time of touching, it is so poisonous that the veil of ignorance covers the mind, the intellect, the chit, and the ego. Man becomes unconscious while awake. He becomes like an animal.
If ever touching or any similar acts occur, come and tell me and I will cleanse it right away for you.
If you indulge in thoughts of a woman or in thoughts of sexuality, if you contemplate or meditate about them, a tuber of sexuality will form. How will it then dissolve then? Having thoughts opposing sexuality will dissolve the tuber.
Once your vision towards a person turns and becomes sexual then the indulgence begins. There is a reason behind it. Behind that there are causes from the previous life. That is why this vision of sexuality does not happen with everyone. It is only with a certain person that it happens. If there were causes laid in a previous life, and an ongoing account continuing in this life and then if indulgence takes place, then realize that this is a large account and therefore be very vigilant. You will need to keep on doing pratikraman towards that person. There should be a lot of alochanas (heart-felt confession), pratikramans (apology coupled with remorse) and pratyakhyans (resolve never to repeat that mistake).
This sex is such a thing that it does not let the mind and the chit remain the way that they want to. And once they fall in this trap of sex and believe that there is happiness there, then the chit begins to go there even more and more by believing that, ‘It is really nice here, it is really good here’, countless numbers of new seeds are sown here.
Questioner: But he has brought all that from his previous life has he not?
Dadashri: His chit’s repeated going there is not something that he has brought this from his previous life. But afterwards he loses control over his chit, when it keeps slipping from his hands even when he does not want to go there, in sexuality. That is why it is better if these boys live with an inner intent of practicing brahmacharya. Then whatever sexual discharge happens either during the day or night is all really a discharge, because they are not in it. If these young adults are involved in a sexual act even once, they will have dreams about it day and night.
Have you not experienced, that if your chit goes into sexuality, you cannot focus properly?
Questioner: If the chit has touched even a bit of the vibrations of sexual impulses then it would not remain still for a long time.
Dadashri: Therefore, what I am trying to say is that you can travel anywhere in the world. If nothing in the world captivates your chit, then you are truly independent. For years I have seen that nothing captivates my chit and therefore I know that I have become completely independent. There is nothing wrong with bad thoughts that may arise, but your chit should never be captivated by anything.
However much the tendencies of the chit wander, that much the self, has to wander. Wherever the chit’s tendencies go, you will have to go with them. Chit draws a map. It draws a map of comings and goings of your next life. You then have to follow that map. Therefore, where all does the tendencies of the chit go?
Questioner: Chit does not get captivated everywhere, but if it does in a certain place, then is there a previous account there?
Dadashri: Yes. The chit will be captivated only if there is an account there. But what should you do now? Purusharth (realized self oriented effort) is that which does not allow the captivation even if there is past account of captivation. It is not considered abrahmacharya as long as pratikraman is done when the chit goes. It is abrahmacharya if pratikraman is not done after the chit goes.
Whatever makes the chit unsteady are all vishayas. Wherever chit goes, outside of the Gnan, the Self, is all vishaya.
Questioner: You said that there is nothing wrong in having any bad thoughts but problem is with the chit going there.
Dadashri: Yes, the problem is with the chit. Wandering of the chit is the problem. There is no problem with any kind of thought at all. But, after acquiring this Gnan, the chit must not wander.
Questioner: What if the chit does wander sometimes?
Dadashri: There you should initiate purusharth of ‘now this should not happen’. Is the chit wandering now as much as it used to before?
Questioner: No, it does not slip that much, yet I am asking about it.
Dadashri: No, but the chit must not leave at all. You will have all kinds of thoughts. There is nothing wrong in it but keep on pushing them away. Start having conversation with the mind. Start conversing with the mind saying, ‘if you meet this person what will you tell him about your project?’ ‘ Where will you arrange transportation for him?’ Or start talking to your mind by about satsang. When you do this mind will show you some new ideas.
What captivates the chit the most? Sex. Once the chit becomes trapped in sex, it destroys all divinity within one. With loss of divinity, one becomes like an animal. Sexual indulgence is the cause of animalistic behavior of human beings. Yet, what I am saying is that all this is an accumulation of karma from past life and it will be discharged sooner or later. The best thing is not to accumulate new ones in this life.